


Two red heads, and a kid with a scar walk into a room..........

by lolrising11



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Again, Comedy night, F/M, Hermione doesn't like harry potter, Insults, Luna only has Slytherin friends, Luna tells good jokes, Not really a romance story, One Shot, Party in the Slytherin common room, Slytherin Hermione Granger, Slytherin lost the House Cup, also Neville, but he ain't here, just fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:21:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27946700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lolrising11/pseuds/lolrising11
Summary: Slytherin lost the House cup. Again. Hermione needs a way to boost morale, and she knows just the way to do it. When a couple of unwanted people show up on their door, the Slytherins will have to deal with some annoying Gryffindor party crashers.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy & Blaise Zabini, Ginny Weasley & Ron Weasley, Harry Potter & Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger & Blaise Zabini, Hermione Granger & Luna Lovegood, Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Luna Lovegood/Blaise Zabini
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	Two red heads, and a kid with a scar walk into a room..........

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic involving characters from the Harry Potter universe, so I really hope you like it. The whole fic was built around the joke at the end, so don't expect too much plot.

Everyone gathered around the Slytherin common room, as Hermione had asked everyone to sit down. Draco stood next to Hermione, and rested his arm on her shoulder.

"What's going on Granger?"

She smiled and pointed to a seat on the couch, her face now in a scolding manor.

"Sit, and I will tell you."

After everyone was seated, and almost everyone was paying somewhat attention, she began.

"Well, as all of you know, things have not been…... the most excited around here, ever since we lost the house cup. Again. But, I thought that it would be a great idea to host a comedy night, in our common room!"

Hermione was excited, but everyone else looked more confused. Digging, she tried to explain it better.

"One night, we could invite our 

house, obviously. And a select few from some other houses, Gryffindor excluded, of course. We could get snacks, and I know that if we bribed the kitchen elves, they would get us some food. We could take turns telling jokes, and it would be a blast."

Everyone was silent, and Hermione was momentarily frightened that her idea would be rejected, but people erupted into conversation about it. Daphne and Pansy were brainstorming ideas for decorations, and Theo and Vincent were discussing who to invite, and Draco came up to Hermione and wrapped his arms around her from behind, which startled her.

"Brilliant, absolutely brilliant! The only thing I'm dreading about it though, is the many shitty jokes we will have to sit through."

She laughed, and broke away after he placed a small kiss on her cheeks. Seeing her opportunity, she jumped straight into a conversation with Blaise about food and snacks.

* * *

Word had spread like wildfire, and anyone who was lucky enough to get a special invitation arrived at midnight after curfew, a couple days later. Everyone was super careful not to get caught by Professor McGonagall, or even Professor Snape, for fear of punishment. Everyone was dressed up to the nines, and even Hermione was able to make her frizzy hair more on the curly side.

The whole place was transformed. Luna had transfigured a couch into a stage, and Theo turned a lamp into a microphone. The fireplace was ablaze, and it felt homey for the first time in a long time.

They were able to convince the elves to supply them with mostly muggle food, at Hermione's request. Most people hadn't even heard of pizza or French fries, but once they stuffed a mouthful of it, the food was gone before the party even started, so they had to get more.

"Hermione," Theo said, "Why did no one tell me how bloody good burgers were? I feel cheated."

She laughed, and placed a hand on his shoulder. Before she could make a witty remark, there was arguing at the entrance to the room. Draco was shout-whispering to a couple of kids. Upon closer inspection, it was revealed to be Ginny Weasley, her brother Ron, and even Harry Potter. Sneering, Hermione made her way to the door.

"Well, well, look who showed up on our doorstep. It's little orphan Annie, and her two best mates, the cowardly street urchins. What are you doing here? No Gryffins allowed, are you daft?"

Draco laughed, and then set his face in his trademark smirk.

"Well, it looks like they were trying to sabotage our little get together."

She watched as Blaise and Theo grabbed a backpack from Harry, and dumped the contents on the floor. Inside, was what looked to be a regular bag of muggle potato chips, some donuts, and a liter of cola. Looking confused, Hermione, looked up at Draco.

"They may look like regular muggle snacks, but they are charmed to make whoever took a bite of those donuts puke for hours on end, the chips would give you a horrible foot fungus, and the cola would make you sneeze uncontrollably." he said.

Ron looked confused.

"How would you know that, snake?"

Draco laughed.

" I once read a book on unique hexes, just in case I wanted to test them on you two. The 

book also taught ways to spot them."

Ron gulped, and took a step back.

Hermione took a step forward.

“If you tell any teacher about the party, which was to cheer us up, by the way, I will personally Crucify you.”

Harry nodded, and Ginny said, 

“Freak” 

Under her breath, before walking away.

“Watch what you say Ginevra,” Hermione shouted after her, “You could get yourself in a bit of trouble with that mouth.”.

As they disappeared up out of the dungeons, Hermione turned to Draco and her friends. 

“Let’s not let these lions ruin our night, come on!”

She dragged them all inside, and they sat and chatted while everyone took their turn trying out comedy. A couple of good ones stuck out in her mind. 

_Luna stepped on stage, Blaise cheering._

_“Hello everyone, I have a special joke I’d like to tell that I read from a Muggle book once. Here’s how it started:_

_A boy was given an assignment from his teacher to write down a couple of sentences, and the next day they would present it to the class. He went home to ask his Mother what to write, and she said, ‘Shut up I’m on the phone!’. He went to his father who was watching a muggle sports game, football. His father shouted, ‘Go, go go!’. Going upstairs, the little boy went to his older brother who was watching another muggle sport, wrestling. He yelled, ‘Hit him with a chair, hit him with a chair!’. Finally he went to his younger brother who was watching a show called Batman. The young boy said: ‘Da na na na, Da na na na, Da na na na, Da na na na, Batman!’. The next day when the boy came to school, his teacher asked him to read what he wrote. He stood up and shouted, ‘Shut up I’m on the phone!’. His teacher asked him what he was doing, and he yelled, ‘Go, go, go!”. The teacher then told him to go to the principal’s office, and asked what he was going to do when he got there. The kid replied with, ‘Hit him with a chair, hit him with a chair!’. The teacher, absolutely horrified, asked who he thought he was. “Da na na na, Da na na na, Da na na na, Da na na na, Batman!’”_

To say everyone laughed would be an understatement. Everyone stopped worrying, if only for a night, about what their future would bring.

**Author's Note:**

> I got the joke from a friend of mine who told it to a bunch of my friends, and we all loved it, so we told it to our family. I really thought the internet deserved this joke told by Luna. Hope you liked it!


End file.
